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CHAPTER 5: BREATH AWARENESS AND BREATH RETRAINING

Chapter 5

 

MINDFUL CHOICE 1

Breath Awareness and Retraining

 

“Breath is the bridge which connects life to consciousness, which unites your body to your thoughts. Whenever your mind becomes scattered, use your breath as the means to take hold of your mind again.” 

                                                                                             Thich Nhất Hanh

“Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. Conscious breathing is my anchor.” 
                                                                                             Thich Nhất Hanh

Do you think about breathing?  If you’re like most people, probably not much. Most people think about breathing only when it’s difficult, such as when they have a bad cold with nasal congestion, or they have a problem with asthma or hay fever.  Otherwise, most of us have 17,000 to 24,000 breaths a day, hardly noticing breath at all.

Your breath follows a particular pattern. We don’t all breathe the same way, and even though breathing is automatic and largely out of conscious awareness, each of us has developed our own habitual way of breathing. How do you breathe? How you breathe may be one of your healthiest behaviors, or damaging to your health, well-being, and ability to manage your stress.

How you breathe affects every aspect of your being, from cardiovascular, neurological, gastrointestinal, and muscular processes to psychological well-being. The pace of your life, your memory, how well you sleep, your energy level, your libido, your ability to concentrate, and your ability to be aware of, and manage emotions, are all heavily influenced by your breath. Although breathing is largely involuntary, cultivating breath awareness and the retraining of your breathing is perhaps your most readily accessible resource for managing stress and anxiety and powerfully influencing your overall health and well-being. Simply cultivating increased awareness of your breath changes everything.

Some of us have chronic anxiety. Some worry too much. One in four will have panic attacks. Understanding your breath is fundamental to dealing with these problems.

Joan was frustrated: “These panicky feelings just seem to come out of the blue.  I can be going about my normal day when I suddenly start feeling all fluttery and queasy.  What’s going on?” 

Robin replied: “Well, they don’t really come out of the blue.  There is always a trigger such as a worrisome thought or memory, or even an image. Sometimes it’s hard to slow things down and figure out what your specific trigger is, and your reaction to the trigger has a lot to do with natural physiology and the way your body responds to disturbing thoughts.  I have some ideas.  Right now, without thinking about it, I’d like you to take a really full breath.”

Robin observed as Joan lifted her chin, arched her back, raised her shoulders, and expanded her upper chest.  Robin pointed out these actions to Joan and asked: “Why are you raising your shoulders and stretching upward?”  Joan replied: “I don’t know, I’ve never thought about it.” 

Robin continued: “Joan, you’re simply breathing the way most anxious people on this planet breathe, from your upper chest.  Your lungs are shaped like this,” Robin said as she indicated the shape of her lungs. “You have a lot of room toward the bottom of your rib cage, but not much lung capacity in your upper torso. When you raise your chin, arch your back and raise your shoulders, you’re simply trying to get those “parts” out of the way she can squeeze a little more air into your upper lungs .This is what is meant by breathing “shallowly.” Anxious people have learned to breathe shallowly, irregularly and rapidly, particularly when they are feeling increased stress.  Often, they feel as though there is not enough air. Sometimes they even forget to breathe.  The physiological effects are uncomfortable, and can be so close to the bodily sensations experienced with a panic attack that they can actually produce panicky feelings or a full-blown panic attack.”

“Joan, there’s a lot we need to talk about in regard to getting a handle on your stress and anxiety.  We are all different and we need to figure out an individualized stress management program that’s right for you, but we start at the same place with everyone – teaching them to be more aware of their breath.”

It’s no wonder we begin work with anxious clients with Breath Awareness and Breath Retraining. Quite simply, Breath Awareness and Retraining is often the basic ingredient for successfully managing stress and anxiety, a claim readily confirmed when we ask clients who are doing well to tell us what has helped them the most. Not surprisingly, they often indicate that being more aware of their breath and practicing a different way of breathing has made all the difference. For many it's transformational, a matter of breath retraining leading to a permanently heightened awareness of breath and the ability to readily use breath for substantial and ongoing stress relief. Breath awareness is also a key foundational factor in each of our other nine Mindful Choices, so it’s the ideal place to begin our journey of transformation from dis-ease to well-being.

Joan, like all who suffer from high anxiety, was eager to hear more. “But why does it feel so bad? Honestly, sometimes I really think I’m going to give myself a heart attack. When it’s happening, I just want so badly for it to stop – but it just keeps going!” Robin was calmly reassuring. “Joan, it’s a paradox. The more upset you become with your anxiety, and the more you have to have it go away, right now, the more difficulty you have. We’re going to talk a lot more about developing self- calming skills, and finding relief by accepting your anxiety, not doing battle with it. Also, anxious people tend to have strong feelings about their anxiety, such as anger, fear, or shame, and these feelings also get in the way. A panic attack has been described as ‘fear of the fearful feelings,’ and this certainly makes sense to us.

Joan was trying hard to absorb all this information, and was feeling some anxiety from merely talking about anxiety. “So, what’s going on in my body anyway?”

Robin replied, “Okay, so without getting too deep into physiology, here’s a quick explanation. It’s all part of how your body and your brain respond to stress. It’s what’s known as the fight or flight response, sometimes referred to as the fight, flight, or freeze response. When your brain perceives a threat whether it’s a life or death emergency or merely an unpleasant thought, part of your autonomic nervous system, your sympathetic nervous system, gets activated and causes the release of adrenaline and noradrenaline from your adrenal glands. Additionally your adrenal glands, activated by hormones released from the hypothalamus, also produce cortisol. High levels of cortisol in your body indicate high stress and can be physically damaging over time.”

“ The fight or flight response is basically an all or nothing response. Everything in your body not necessary for dealing with a life or death situation gets shut down while resources for fighting or fleeing get activated. This is why you experience so many symptoms at the same time, and this barrage of symptoms can seem overwhelming and frightening, leading to still more fear and anxiety.”

“ It’s time-limited and can’t continue indefinitely. When your brain gets the message that there is no real emergency, your parasympathetic system brings about the release of other chemicals to counteract the adrenaline. Unfortunately, fearfulness of the symptoms with excited what-if self- talk can prolong and even increase the anxiety response. What nature intended as a temporary life-saving response, when not understood and accepted, can become ongoing stress and anxiety. Living in this state over time can have a variety of physiological and psychological consequences such as anger, irritability, depression, high anxiety, chest pain, headaches, sleep difficulties, and a suppressed immune system.”

“The good news? You can learn to regulate both your physiological and psychological responses. With practice you can get very good at quickly activating your parasympathetic system and calming yourself – even when faced with very real difficulties. It begins with learning about your breath. Let’s get started.”

Breath Awareness and Retraining PRE-TEST

DIRECTIONS: Under each description, choose the number that best represents agreement with your thinking, beliefs, or behavior for the past week  and record that number on the following table.


0= not true at all, 1= mostly not true, 2= partially true, 3= largely true, 4=totally true

Breath

Awareness

b

c

d

e

Total

Divided

and

Retraining

f

g

i

j

by 2=

______


a. I Engage in Daily Breathing Practice. I practice diaphragmatic breathing for at least 10 minutes daily, focusing on breathing from my diaphragm (belly breathing) in such a manner that my abdomen is expanding with each inhalation while there is little movement in my upper torso. My intent is to have my breath be as gentle, natural, and quiet as possible. Whenever my thoughts drift to other matters, I gently bring my thoughts back to a focus on my breathing. Although continuous practice is preferable, it’s quite all right to practice by way of a number of “mindful pauses,” during which I take three deep, slow, gentle, quiet diaphragmatic breaths.

Select 0, 1, 2, 3, or 4 and record your score in the Intentional Relating table above.

 b. I Frequently Check in with Myself. I frequently check in with myself during the day   (preferably at least once per hour) observing my physical state.  I am aware when I am responding to stressors by being up-tight with rapid or shallow upper chest breathing and increased muscle tension. (Note: circle 4 if "up-tight, rapid or shallow upper chest breathing with increased muscle tension" did not occur today.)

Select 0, 1, 2, 3, or 4 and record your score in the Intentional Relating table above.

c. I Use Shallow Upper Chest Breathing as a Cue. I am able to use my awareness of my upper chest rapid or shallow breathing and resulting up-tight feelings as a sign of rising anxiety and stress levels, and use that awareness as a signal or cue to consciously begin calming myself. (Note: circle 4 if "upper chest rapid or shallow breathing and resulting up-tight feelings" did not occur today.)

Select 0, 1, 2, 3, or 4 and record your score in the Intentional Relating table above.

d. I am Aware of the Physical Reaction/Self Talk Connection. I am able to pay attention to self-talk co-occurring with shallow or upper chest breathing. I am aware my physiological state is a result of things my mind is telling me and that my body is responding with heightened physiological arousal. I am able to tune into my self-talk while seeing the relationship between thinking and my physical response.

Select 0, 1, 2, 3, or 4 and record your score in the Intentional Relating table above.

e.  I Have a Growing Awareness of My Breath. Having begun with the intention to pay more attention to my breathing (an intention continuously strengthened with daily practice), I find myself experiencing a greater awareness of my breath throughout the day.

Select 0, 1, 2, 3, or 4 and record your score in the Intentional Relating table above.

f.  I Use My Breathing to Slow Down. I am able to use awareness of my breath to regulate the pace of my day. Paying attention to my breath helps me be aware of the need to slow my pace and consequently shift gears to a pace that is more reasonable and helpful in my overall stress management and ability to mindfully focus my attention.

Select 0, 1, 2, 3, or 4 and record your score in the Intentional Relating table above.

g. Breath Awareness And Retraining Are Top Priorities. I view breath awareness and breath retraining as essential to my stress reduction and well-being.

Select 0, 1, 2, 3, or 4 and record your score in the Intentional Relating table above.

h. I Use My Breath as a Relationship Tool. Paying attention to my breath helps me be centered and present in relationships, giving me the ability to show up fully present in the moment, being the person I want to be in the relationship.

Select 0, 1, 2, 3, or 4 and record your score in the Intentional Relating table above.

i. My Breath Is Helping Me Listen Better and Be More Compassionate. Paying attention to my breath and breathing deeper, slower, more regularly and more quietly is helping me be more attentive, focused, less reactive, a more patient listener, and more compassionate with others.

Select 0, 1, 2, 3, or 4 and record your score in the Intentional Relating table above.

j. Breath Awareness and Retraining Is Helping Me Let Go of Barriers to Change. Breath awareness and retraining is helping me let go of judgment, resentment, defensiveness, emotional reactivity, and resistance to change, qualities that have been limiting my own peacefulness and growth.

Select 0, 1, 2, 3, or 4 and record your score in the Intentional Relating table above.

The following is an example of the table squares a-J filled in with 10 scores, each square representing the 0-4 score on that particular statement. The scores are then totaled in the last square, for a total of 27 that is then divided by 2 for a final score of 13.5

Breath

Awareness

      3

b

      2

c

      3

d

      1

e

      4

Total

Divided

and

Retraining

f

      3

g

      3

h

      2

i

      3

j

      3

by 2=

___13.5___

 

 

The score of 13.5 is then located on the grid below, falling on the dividing line between 13 and 14. This means that for the past week Breath Awareness and Retraining performance was in the “good” category. Overall, this means that the person taking this pretest was doing well with being conscious and intentional in his or her Breath Awareness and Retraiining. However, there is still substantial room for improvement. In fact, even with a perfect score there is no limit to how masterful with can become in this Mindful Choice. No set of skills is more important.

Okay, now it’s time to enter your score on the grid below.

How did you do? Remember, no matter how well you have done on this pretest, there is no limit to how masterful you can become in utilizing your breath to increase well-being.

The possibilities for growth and mastery are limitless. How good do you want to be in your Breath Awareness and Retraining?

Let’s first take a deeper look at the rationale behind the 10 statements in our pretest,

The thoughts behind the Life Choice 1 assessment statements

Each of the ten statements can be thought of as an affirmation, or as a desired state you want to achieve. Rating a statement with a “4” on your Choice 1 self-assessment is an indication you are at an optimal level of functioning for a vital component of Breath Awareness and Retraining. The statements are repeated here with a brief explanation of the thinking that went into the construction of each statement.

a. I Engage in Daily Breathing Practice. I practice diaphragmatic breathing for at least 10 minutes daily, focusing on breathing from my diaphragm (belly breathing) in such a manner that my abdomen is expanding with each inhalation while there is little movement in my upper torso. My intent is to have my breath be as gentle, natural, and quiet as possible. Whenever my thoughts drift to other matters, I gently bring my thoughts back to a focus on my breathing. Although continuous practice is preferable, it’s quite all right to practice by way of a number of “mindful pauses,” during which I take three deep, slow, gentle, quiet diaphragmatic breaths.

It’s not just a matter of occasional diaphragmatic breathing, or “belly breathing.” It’s practicing each day, and practicing to the point where you have heightened awareness of your breath all the time, possibly a totally new awareness. While doing “mini relaxations,” or practicing the “Three Deep Breaths” Thomas Crum writes about in a book by the same name is vitally important, we also stress the importance of 10 continuous minutes of focusing on breath, simply paying attention to the breath and bringing  attention back to breath awareness whenever thoughts drift, as surely they will, to other matters. 10 minutes can seem like a very long time, especially to anxious people, so the practice can be a total of at least 10 minutes utilizing a number of “mindful pauses.” The focus is not just on diaphragmatic breathing, but on being increasingly comfortable, and breathing in as gentle, natural, and quiet a manner as possible. The goal is for diaphragmatic breathing in time to be effortless, and literally become second nature.

b. I Frequently Check in with Myself. I frequently check in with myself during the day   (preferably at least once per hour) observing my physical state.  I am aware when I am responding to stressors by being up-tight with rapid or shallow upper chest breathing and increased muscle tension. (Note: circle 4 if "up-tight, rapid or shallow upper chest breathing with increased muscle tension" did not occur today.)

The goal is heightened awareness of the connection between your stress response and your breathing. The more you practice diaphragmatic breathing, the more you find yourself becoming quickly aware that “up tight” feelings go along with shallow, upper chest thoracic breathing and tensed muscles. Rather than breath being something you’re unaware of, we want you to become an active observer of your own breath. In the beginning such breath awareness is best accomplished by frequently checking in with yourself until awareness is natural and ongoing.

c. I Use Shallow Upper Chest Breathing as a Cue. I am able to use my awareness of my upper chest rapid or shallow breathing and resulting up-tight feelings as a sign of rising anxiety and stress levels, and use that awareness as a signal or cue to consciously begin calming myself. (Note: circle 4 if "upper chest rapid or shallow breathing and resulting up-tight feelings" did not occur today.)

The very act of observing your breath changes it and a new possibility is created. The goal is for you to seize upon this new awareness to make the connection between your stress response, and your breathing, choosing to make a self-calming shift. Simply notice that you are “up tight,” with that awareness providing a “window of opportunity” for re-directing your breath. Purposefully change your breath from shallow, rapid, irregular, and noisy breath, to breathing that is deep, slow, regular, and quiet. By doing so you will have initiated a powerful relaxation response.

d. I am Aware of the Physical Reaction/Self Talk Connection. I am able to pay attention to self-talk co-occurring with shallow or upper chest breathing. I am aware my physiological state is a result of things my mind is telling me and that my body is responding with heightened physiological arousal. I am able to tune into my self-talk while seeing the relationship between thinking and my physical response.

Are you aware your thinking triggers a stress response? Can you see the connection between what you are telling yourself and how your body is reacting? If you’re telling yourself you will die in five minutes, and you accept that as an absolute and indisputable certainty if you don’t quickly react, your body will almost certainly be on high alert. As your sympathetic nervous system takes charge your entire physiology is mobilized to get you to safety. As part of that overall stress response, your breathing becomes shallow and rapid, and your breathing in turn triggers other aspects of fight or flight.

Can you not only see the connection between self-talk and physiology, but also recognize that self-talk is simply a story you are telling yourself?

e.  I Have a Growing Awareness of My Breath. Having begun with the intention to pay more attention to my breathing (an intention continuously strengthened with daily practice), I find myself experiencing a greater awareness of my breath throughout the day.

This is why we continuously stress “practice.” It’s not just a matter of knowing how to breathe diaphragmatically and doing so while under stress. That’s helpful, for sure, but it’s only part of what’s needed. We push for a daily practice of breath retraining and awareness, thorough and frequent enough to result in ongoing heightened awareness of breath, and instant recognition of the kind of breathing that goes with stress and anxiety. You can only change something you are aware of, and being more aware of your breathing give you a tremendous opportunity to manage your stress and become more mindful.

f.  I Use My Breathing to Slow Down. I am able to use awareness of my breath to regulate the pace of my day. Paying attention to my breath helps me be aware of the need to slow my pace and consequently shift gears to a pace that is more reasonable and helpful in my overall stress management and ability to mindfully focus my attention.

Again, it’s the regular practice of breath awareness and retraining that gives you the ability to regulate your speed. Imagine your car regularly getting stuck in a speed well in excess of the speed limit. Of course, you would waste no time in getting the car fixed or getting another car. How about the speed of your life? Is it dangerous? Humane? Is it a reasonable way to live your life? Breath awareness and retraining allows you to set the pace, and manage your stress. We don’t see any possibility of stress management being effective without developing awareness of breath and the ability to use that awareness effectively.

g. Breath Awareness And Retraining Are Top Priorities. I view breath awareness and breath retraining as essential to my stress reduction and well-being.

This statement is getting at the degree to which you embrace the concept that breath awareness and breath retraining matter. We occasionally have clients who listen patiently to us emphasizing breath work, only to disregard that information, paying little attention to this essential tool. They are eventually convinced, and finally come around to doing the work, but valuable time is wasted, and more complete management of their stress and anxiety is delayed.

h. I Use My Breath as a Relationship Tool. Paying attention to my breath helps me be centered and present in relationships, giving me the ability to show up fully present in the moment, being the person I want to be in the relationship.

Does this statement make sense to you? Paying attention to your breath is a key factor in being conscious and intentional in your relationships. We tell our clients to never, ever, try to resolve relationship issues when they are “uptight,” or in fight or flight mode. Uptight means having basically two choices, fight or flight, and neither is much help in making relationships work. Try as you may, if you are operating from fight or flight mode, you will simply make a mess of things. Of course, you have to know that you are uptight and that could be a problem. You might find yourself so stressed you’re unaware of your state. That’s where paying attention to your breath comes in. Take the time to calm and center yourself, moving your center from your upper chest to your abdomen. Calm down, slow down, give up control, give up having to be right, give up having to win, give up having to defend, and instead choose to be calm, non-reactive, and able to be fully effective in the relationship. Want to be masterful in your relationships? Breath awareness is the difference between responding poorly or responding with effectiveness and emotional intelligence.

i. My Breath Is Helping Me Listen Better and Be More Compassionate. Paying attention to my breath and breathing deeper, slower, more regularly and more quietly is helping me be more attentive, focused, less reactive, a more patient listener, and more compassionate with others.

Are you able to let go of defensiveness and reactivity? Are you sometimes impatient? Do you sometimes miss what other people are trying to tell you? Do you find it hard to be understanding, or have empathy? Great listeners and those that are truly masterful in relationships share a secret. They are able to be fully present in the moment, and able to put their own agenda on the back burner for a moment, choosing to be fully present for the other – and they are not uptight! They are able to breathe fully and be calm and relaxed, able to give the other the gift of their calm, non-anxious presence. Most importantly, managing your breath is a key in being more compassionate and compassion for self and others is central to our well-being.

j. Breath Awareness and Retraining Is Helping Me Let Go of Barriers to Change. Breath awareness and retraining is helping me let go of judgment, resentment, defensiveness, emotional reactivity, and resistance to change, qualities that have been limiting my own peacefulness and growth.

Breath awareness and retraining is instrumental in developing the quality of “mindfulness.” Mindfulness is all about self-awareness, paying attention to what’s happening in the present moment, including what’s happening within yourself. When you’re practicing mindfulness, you have the ability to be aware of your own attitudes, your own tendency to judge, or hang onto resentments. You have the ability to realize you may be part of the problem, through your defensiveness or resistance to change. Mindful awareness helps you choose a different path, and mindful awareness would not be possible without the ability to calm and center yourself, focusing on what you truly want. Breath work is a vital tool in developing this awareness.

Breath Awareness and Retraining Discussion

In our first session with an anxious client, we ask him or her to take in a really deep breath, without giving it much thought. What we usually observed is a lifting of the shoulders, an arching of the neck, and a lot of expansion of the upper torso. Incidentally, the lifting of the shoulders is simply to get them out of the way so that a bit more air can be squeezed into the upper chest. This is what we refer to as upper chest, or thoracic breathing.

We believe that most anxious people on the planet have learned to breathe from their upper chest as their primary way of breathing. When they are stressed, they unconsciously breathe more shallowly or rapidly, sometimes forgetting to breathe altogether. They are literally "uptight," carrying all of their tension in their upper torso, neck and shoulders. Not surprisingly, they often complain of neck and shoulder pain, chest pain, headaches, difficulty swallowing, tightness in their face, etc. Often, they have report experiencing tightness or pressure in the chest, difficulty breathing, and the sensation that there isn't enough air.

It’s physiological.  We live in a high stress society and our breathing patterns reflect stress levels.  Upper chest, or clavicular breathing parallels the fight-or-flight response and all it takes is a worrisome thought to put us in fight or flight mode.  Our body can’t differentiate between disturbing thoughts, and being confronted by Smilodon populator, that 660 pound Saber-toothed Tiger that once roamed the Midwestern United States, becoming extinct about 10,000 BC.  Your body simply senses an emergency situation, responding with tense muscles, ready for action full-body physiological arousal, and shallow, rapid breathing with your neck, shoulders, and upper rib cage doing all the work of moving air in and out of your lungs. 

Shallow breathing increases heart rate and blood pressure, and greatly increases the physical symptoms that go along with a stress reaction.  It often becomes habitual.  When shallow, upper chest breathing, or holding one’s breath becomes chronic, it’s usually associated with high levels of tension and chronic stress and anxiety. Tense people who hold their breath aren’t getting enough oxygen and have higher levels of carbon dioxide in their bodies, contributing to exhaustion and depression. Rapid and shallow breathing associated with anxiety and stress on the other hand , often results in feeling lightheaded with weakness, numbness, agitation, tingling, heart palpitations, and shortness of breath.  Short, shallow breathing leads to getting rid of too much carbon dioxide too fast without at the same time increasing the intake of oxygen.  Blood vessels in your brain can become constricted, leading to headaches, dizziness, numbness, or feeling strange within your own body – all the result of a brain deprived of oxygen.

Many are almost continuously "uptight," a very graphic and accurate expression, with  physiology controlled by an overactive sympathetic nervous system preparing us for a crisis which may never come.  Believe it or not, that Saber-toothed Tiger is not coming back but we disturb ourselves anyway and convince ourselves that we’re seriously threatened. 

Helping us face danger, real or imagined, is the function of the sympathetic nervous system, part of the autonomic nervous system. It mobilizes us to deal with a threat, allowing us to instantly react to a perceived danger by increasing our ability to either fight or escape. Anxious people however, are all too often in "fight or flight mode." Once necessary for our survival as a species, for many anxious people, it becomes a conditioned reaction that leads us to be hyper -vigilant and overly reactive until we are exhausted – with the risk that our bodies are increasingly damaged by the destructive effects of again and again being in survival mode.

Diaphragmatic breathing, or abdominal breathing is the natural mode of breathing for infants and adults who are sleeping. You have probably noticed a baby, or your dog or cat going to sleep and immediately, and quite visibly, there is more emphasis on breathing from their abdomen. Of course they don't have lungs in their bellies, so what's going on?  What’s happening is a kind of billows effect. As air fills the lower lungs to the diaphragm, the diaphragm stretches downward and the stomach expands outward with each inhalation and contracts inward with each exhalation. Most importantly, physiology is now controlled by the parasympathetic system, which has as a principal purpose letting go of stress. Understanding this simple fact is crucial to mastering your own relaxation response.

We ask our clients to begin a daily practice of breathing retraining, beginning first with simply learning to be aware of their breath. We ask them to make a commitment to embark on a breathing practice regimen that they will keep up for at least a year, or until breath-work has been Incorporated into a regular meditation practice. Here's what we ask them to do:

  • Go home and lay down on your back. (Breath-work can be accomplished, standing, walking, riding in your car, working in your garden, or during virtually any other activity. We ask people to practice breath-work initially while lying down, as this is the easiest way to begin breath awareness and retraining.)
  • Place one hand on your belly button and one hand on the center of your chest.
  • Practice breathing in such a manner that only your belly button hand is moving. As air fills your lungs to your diaphragm, it makes your stomach move in and out, and hence the hand movement of the belly button hand. (Women, self-conscious about their stomachs, sometimes resist moving their stomachs in and out, but we are quick to point out that this is a primary way of shaping and toning abdominal muscles.)
  • The hand on your chest should be moving very little if at all.
  • The goal is to keep up the practice for 10 minutes (or shorter periods totaling 10 minutes), and to continue practicing at least once a day for the next year, or until breath work has become part of a regular meditation practice or diaphragmatic breathing has become routine and relatively easy.
  • Your mind may want to go off in other directions. Just keep gently bringing your focus back to your breath. (There’s no need for counting or doing anything other than simply observing the breath. Your mind will wander because that's what our minds do. Don’t worry about it. Just bring your focus back to your breath)
  • It may be difficult at first, but it will certainly get easier with practice. People who have been anxious for years, often have a difficult time with breath awareness and retraining.  Sometimes, people who have been anxious for a long time report that thinking about their breath makes breathing more difficult and actually creates more anxiety.  We assure them that their reaction is normal and that it gets easier with practice.  In some cases, we tell people that they don’t have to do anything with their breath except notice their breathing and allow the breath to breathe itself.  You can try too hard.  Easy does it!
  •  The goal is to get to the point where diaphragmatic breathing seems easy and natural, even effortless. It's not forced.

Don’t be surprised if a practice that at first seemed very difficult, becomes over time your normal way of breathing. You may find you are quite naturally and routinely breathing from your diaphragm, only rarely engaging in shallow thoracic breathing. You shouldn’t be surprised if you get to the point where breathing the way anxious people routinely breathe, seems so uncomfortable that you quickly return to diaphragmatic breathing.

This practice does some amazing things. First, you'll be impressed with how quickly you become more aware of your breathing 24-7.

Secondly, since your breathing and your anxiety are so interrelated, you will also be more aware of your anxiety level. We ask our clients to routinely put a number on their anxiety from 1 to 10, with 10 being the most anxiety they have ever experienced, and 1 being the least anxiety they have experienced. Joining awareness of your breath with awareness of your level of anxiety is powerful, and leads to …

The third amazing development – you now have a way to quickly make a shift in how you manage your anxiety. Many anxious people are not initially aware they are anxious, but breath awareness changes the equation. As it becomes apparent you are "uptight" and breathing from your upper chest, you discover you have a “cue” to remind yourself that you're anxious and need to be breathing differently as a way of reducing your anxiety.

Fourth, in our list of amazing developments, you now find that breathing awareness and retraining has given you a learned and practiced relaxation response that you can readily plug-in when you realize you are anxious, allowing you to quickly lower your anxiety and stress. Our clients frequently report improved management of their anxiety and stress immediately upon beginning the practice, sometimes the very next day.

Breath awareness and retraining gives you a powerful tool, but it’s a tool that requires ongoing awareness and practice. Develop the habit of frequently checking in with yourself and noticing your breathing. Each time you find yourself with upper chest breathing, make a shift and begin to breathe from your diaphragm. Soon you will notice that you are getting through your days with much less stress.

Breath Awareness and Retraining is an essential component for each of the other Mindful Choices. For example, Mindful Eating (Choice 3) requires slowing down and establishing a more conscious and intentional relationship with food.  The way we approach food often mirrors the way we approach life with rapid unconscious eating paralleling ongoing high stress.  Learning to relax, slow down, breathe while eating works wonders in enjoying food more, making better food choices, and actually eating less.  Breath awareness and retraining is the foundation for this Choice. Similarly, Intentional Relating (Choice 7) requires the ability to shift from fight or flight mode to a heightened awareness of how you want to be in the relationship, with the result that you can choose to relate with the emotional intelligence required to be masterful in how you deal with others. In the same manner, all other Choices have Breath Awareness and Retraining as a foundation.

Quick Start: things I can start doing today

  • Retake the Breath Awareness and Retraining Self-Assessment.  In taking the self-assessment previously, you may not have fully understood the meaning of each statement, or why the statement was created. Now that you’ve done the reading, you should be much clearer on the importance of Breath Awareness and Retraining. Re-take the self-assessment daily for the next 30 days. Strive to get your score consistently within the optimal area.
  • Frequently during your day, remind yourself to take three deep diaphragmatic breaths. Focus on your breath being deep rather than shallow, slow rather than rapid, regular, rather than irregular, and quiet, rather than noisy. Strive to make your breath as effortless, and gentle as possible, virtually, letting your breath breathe itself.
  • At the end of each session of diaphragmatic breathing, pause to reflect on how you feel. Enjoy the new feelings of calm and relaxation.
  • As you begin breathing practice, and when you end your breathing practice, scan your body for tension. Compare your level of tension following the breathing practice with the level you experienced at the beginning.
  • Choose regular events, such as having a drink of water, or other beverage, going to the bathroom, or stopping at a traffic light, to remind yourself to breathe diaphragmatically.
  • Try to catch yourself being “up-tight,” noticing how you are breathing and letting that state be the signal for you to breathe diaphragmatically.
  • While “belly breathing,” tune into your self-talk and notice if it is anxiety generating. If so, see if you can soften your self-talk in conjunction with your diaphragmatic breathing, perhaps telling yourself “it’s okay,” or “let it go.” Bill’s favorite mantra is “Let it be.” The idea is to be self soothing in your self talk. It’s of no value to breathe diaphragmatically, if you are highly anxious in what you are telling yourself. That would be like having one foot on the brake and one foot on the accelerator. It simply doesn’t work. Remember to talk to yourself in a soft, gentle, soothing manner while engaging in diaphragmatic breathing. Attention to the “tone” of your self talk.
  • Persevere. Remember that breath awareness and retraining is perhaps the single most important thing you can do for your overall health and well-being, including your stress management. It may be difficult, but just keep practicing and you will find you have more power over your anxiety and stress, than you might ever have imagined. Also, remember that breath awareness and retraining is basic to the next nine choices.

If you find yourself running into difficulty, you might try answering the following questions:

                                                   Mindful Choice 1 Personal Development Worksheet

Step 1: Identify a foundational value, or values.  In other words, why is this Mindful Choice important to me?  For example,  do I value self calming skills?  Do I value Breath Awareness and Retraining for health benefits?  Do I value Breath Awareness and Retraining for helping me be conscious and intentional in my relationships?

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Step 2: How would I describe my present Mindful Choice 1 performance? 

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Step 3: In regard to my breathing, what is the behavior I want to change?

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Step 4: What is my personal vision for Mindful Choice 1?  Imagining some point in the future.  What Do I see myself doing in regard to Life Choice 1? 

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Step 5: What do I hope to get from Breath Awareness and Retraining?

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Step 6: To pursue breath awareness and retraining to the point that I am much more aware of my breath and well practiced at diaphragmatic breathing, how will I have to be in ways that might constitute a major stretch for me?  Do I need a new way of being that would constitute a paradigm shift?  Are there radically different ways of being (thinking, feeling, acting) that contribute to doing Breath Awareness and Retraining and getting what I want to get?

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Step 7: In regard to Breath Awareness and Retraining, How will I have to act on a daily or ongoing basis so that I wind up doing what I want to do, and getting what I want to get, and being the way I want to be? How do I have to discipline myself to have consistent, routine, and well practiced daily or ongoing actions that steadily contribute to the results I really want and value in my life?

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Step 8: What are the barriers such as negative self talk or lack of time that might prevent me from reaching my Mindful Choice 1 goals?

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Step 9: Who will be helpful or supportive in my Mindful Choice 1 change efforts?

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Step 10: How will I be rewarded while I am accomplishing the changes I desire?

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Step 11: how important is this to me on a scale from 1 to 10, with 10 being extremely important?  How might I sabotage the plan, or allow others to sabotage the plan?

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Step 12: I am committing to the following SMART goal (Specific as to actions I will take, Meaningful and in alignment with my values, Adaptive in that I strongly believe my life will be improved, Realistic and achievable, and Time-framed with specific time dedicated).

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Further Reading

Benson, H., and E. Stuart. 1993. The Wellness Book: The Comprehensive Guide to Maintaining Health and Treating Stress-Related Illness. New York: Simon & Schuster.

 

Carbonell, D. (2016). The Worry Trick: How Your Brain Tricks You into Expecting the Worst and What You Can Do about It. Oakland: New Harbinger Publications.


Crum, T. (2009). Three Deep Breaths. San Francisco: Berrett-Koeler Publishers Inc.

 

Farhi, D. (1996). The Breathing Book: Good Vitality Through Essential Breath Work. New York: Owl Books.

 

Hahn, T. (2011). Peace in Every Breath. New York, NY: HarperCollins e-books.


Hendricks, G. (1995). Conscious Breathing: Breathwork for Health, Stress Release and Personal Mastery. New York: Bantam Books.


Lewis, D. (2004). Free Your Breath, Free Your Life: Conscious Breathing Can Relieve Stress, Increase Vitality, and Help You Live More Fully. Boston: Shambhala Publications.
Speeds, C. 2004. Ways to Better Breathing. London: Anness Publishing.

 

Strom, M. (2010). A Life Worth Breathing: A Yoga Master’s Handbook of Strength, Grace, and Healing. New York: Skyhorse Publishing.


 

 

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